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Dumb & Dumber

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Detective Dale - Did you get a make on the vehicle.Lawrence Kopp-Ah, yes sir, They're driving an 84... sheepdog.
Size: 81.7KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 967
Previews: 1236
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Flight Director-Sir, you can't go in there. Lloyd-It's OK, I'm a limo driver.
Size: 71.2KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1172
Previews: 1408
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Harry- "I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this." Lloyd- I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver is full of shit!"
Size: 82Kb
Format: WAV
Downloads: 2278
Previews: 1545
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Harry- Holy Jesus, look at the butt on that. Lloyd-Yeah, he must work out
Size: 69.9KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1709
Previews: 1553
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Harry- I got... I got to stop and got to the bathroom Lloyd-Just go man. Oh... that's really warm
Size: 156KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1081
Previews: 960
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Harry- My parakeet Peetie, he's dead. Lloyd-Oh... oh man, I'm sorry, what happened?Harry-His head fell off! Lloyd-HIS HEAD FELL OFF! Harry-Yeah, he was pretty old.
Size: 161KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1389
Previews: 1082
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Harry- Nice set of hooters you have there. Mary- I beg your pardon? Harry- The owls, there beautiful
Size: 66.6KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1405
Previews: 1223
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Harry- Skis huh? Beth Jordan- That's right. Harry-Great, they yours? Beth Jordan- Uh huh. Harry-Both of them? Beth Jordan- Yah. Harry-Huh... cool.
Size: 155KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 664
Previews: 502
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Harry- Then they slapped this bullet proof vest on me and gave me a gun. Lloyd- But what if he shot you in the face? Harry- What if they shot me in the face? Beth Jordan- That's a risk we were willing to take
Size: 124KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 715
Previews: 526
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Harry- We had the most incredibly romantic time together. I thought we were going to be together forever. And then...huh...oh boy...huh... about a week later, right out of the blue, she sends me a John Deer letter.
Size: 103KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 633
Previews: 426
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Harry- Yeah, I called her up. She gave me a bunch of crap about not listening to her enough or something. I don't know, I wasn't paying attention.
Size: 67.5KB
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Downloads: 1666
Previews: 1062
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Harry- You sold my dead bird to a blind kid! Lloyd, Peetie didn't even have a head. Lloyd-Harry, I took care of it!
Size: 111KB
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Downloads: 1012
Previews: 835
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Harry-According to the map we've only gone about four inches. You know, I don't think we have enough gas money
Size: 56.6KB
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Downloads: 629
Previews: 599
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Harry-No sir, I W-w-w-w-w-wouldn't... Lloyd- No sir, don't. Don't dri...Motorcycle Cop-You'd keep your mouth shut if you knew what was good for ya buddy. (takes a swig of Lloyds piss from the beer bottle) Lloyd- Tic Tac sir?
Size: 112KB
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Downloads: 894
Previews: 673
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Harry-One time we successfully mated a bulldog with a shitzu... .Mary- Really, that's weird.Harry-Yeah, we... we called it a Bullshit
Size: 130KB
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Downloads: 1144
Previews: 674
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Harry-So, you got fired again huh? Lloyd-Oh yeah!, they always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident
Size: 62.9KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 574
Previews: 502
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Harry-That was genius Lloyd... shear genius. Where did you come up with a scam like that? Lloyd- I saw it in a movie once Harry-Ha Ha that was incredible. So what happened... So the guy tricked some sucker into picking up his tab and gets away with it scott free. Lloyd-No, in the movie they catch up to him a half mile down the road and slit his throat... It was a good one huh huh
Size: 259KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 641
Previews: 413
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Lloyd and Harry- Singing the mocking Bird song
Size: 306KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 3128
Previews: 2003
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Lloyd- "First time I set eyes on Mary Swanson, I got that romantic, old fashioned feeling where I'd do anything to bone her."Harry- "That's a special feeling Lloyd."
Size: 86.3KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 805
Previews: 416
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Lloyd- "We've got no food. We've got no job, our pets HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!"
Size: 53KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 2150
Previews: 1442
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Lloyd- Excuse me Flo?
Size: 15.6KB
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Downloads: 976
Previews: 1290
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Lloyd- Feels good to mingle with these laid back country folk don't it Harry? I-like-it-a-lot
Size: 66.2KB
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Downloads: 976
Previews: 864
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Lloyd- Got room for one more if you still want to go to Aspin. Harry-Where did you find that? Lloyd- Some kid back in town, traded the van for it straight up. I can get 70 miles to the gallon on this hog. Harry- You know Lloyd, just when I think you couldn't be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself! Both- (Laugh and try to give each other a high five but miss.)
Size: 417KB
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Downloads: 878
Previews: 378
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Lloyd- Hey guys, whoa, big gulps huh? all right. Well see ya later.
Size: 65KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1377
Previews: 1032
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Lloyd- Hey, I was wondering when you were going to get up.
Size: 71.5KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 465
Previews: 485
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Lloyd- Hey, want to hear the most annoying sound in the world? Ahaaaaaaaaaa!
Size: 86.3KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 3927
Previews: 2217
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Lloyd- I desperately want to make love to a school boy
Size: 26.5KB
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Downloads: 1588
Previews: 1316
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Lloyd- I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart... And I didn't even see it coming.
Size: 76.8KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 1130
Previews: 742
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Lloyd- Man... You are one pathetic loser.
Size: 44.7KB
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Downloads: 2684
Previews: 1777
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Lloyd- No Way! That's great... We've Landed On The Moon!
Size: 79.2KB
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Downloads: 840
Previews: 784
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Lloyd- Pardon me Mr. PERFECT! I guess I forgot that you never ever make a mistake
Size: 133KB
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Downloads: 1198
Previews: 780
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Lloyd- So, where are you headed? Mary- Aspin. Lloyd- Mmm, California... Beautiful.
Size: 71.7KB
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Downloads: 694
Previews: 486
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Lloyd- That's a lovely accent you have there... New Jersey?Bus stop lady Lisa Stothard-Austria. Lloyd-Austria! Well then... good day mate! Let's put another shrimp on the barbie.
Size: 171KB
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Downloads: 1185
Previews: 650
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Lloyd-Hey!, I guess they're right. Senior Citizens, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose
Size: 92.8KB
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Downloads: 1001
Previews: 536
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Lloyd-How much you want to bet? Harry- I don't bet. Lloyd-What do you mean you don't bet? Harry-I mean I don't bet. You know that. I don't gamble. Lloyd-Looser. Harry-I don't. Lloyd- Looser. Harry- I never have... Lloyd- Looser. Harry-...and I never will. Lloyd- Yeah right! I'll bet you 20 bucks that I can get you gambling before the end of the day. Harry- No Way! Lloyd- I'll give you 3-1 odds. Harry-Nope. Lloyd-5-1. Harry-Nope. Lloyd-10-1.Harry- You're on. Both-(Laugh) Lloyd-I'm gonna get ya. Harry-Uh uh. Lloyd-Uh huh. I don't know how but I'm going to get ya. Harry-Nuh uh. Lloyd- Yah. Harry-Nuh uh. Lloyd- Oh yah. Both-(Laugh)
Size: 371KB
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Downloads: 914
Previews: 504
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Lloyd-Slimmon... Sommen... Simmon... So... Swenson... Swanson? Harry- Maybe on the briefcase. Look on the...Lloyd- Oh yeah! It's right here... Samsonite! I was way off. I knew it started with an "S" though
Size: 130KB
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Downloads: 821
Previews: 473
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Lloyd-Uh, what is the soup du jour?Waitress- It's the soup of the day.Lloyd-Mmm, that sounds good. I'll have that
Size: 80.6KB
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Downloads: 841
Previews: 503
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Lloyd-Wait a sec... I think I just... Yeah, I just had an idea
Size: 57.2KB
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Downloads: 2452
Previews: 1118
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Lloyd-Why you going to the airport... Flying somewhere? Mary- How'd you guess? Lloyd-Ah, I saw the luggage. Then, when I noticed the airline ticket I put two and two together.
Size: 98.6KB
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Downloads: 565
Previews: 282
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Lloyd-You're It! Harry- You're It. Lloyd-You're it, Quitzies. Harry- Anti-quitzies. Lloyd-You're it. Harry- Quitzies, no anti-quitzies, no startzies Lloyd- You can't do that! Harry- You can to. Lloyd-Can not, stamp it! Harry-Can to, double stamp it, no erasies. Lloyd- Can not, triple stamp it, no erasies, touch blue make it true. Harry- No no no, you can't triple stamp a double stamp. Lloyd-La la la. Harry- You can't triple stamp a double stamp Lloyd. Lloyd- La la la la. Harry-You can't triple stamp a double stamp. Lloyd-La la la. Harry- Lloyd! Lloyd-La la la. Harry- Lloyd!
Size: 210KB
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Downloads: 1096
Previews: 433
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Mary-So, you'll pick me up tonight at 7:45?Harry- No, uh, well no I got a few things I got to take care of first. How about quarter to eight.Mary- (Laughs) Harry- OK, 7:45.
Size: 134KB
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Downloads: 586
Previews: 327
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Sea bass- You going to eat that? Harry-What that...no...yes...no...well no...I...I...It crossed my mind. Yeah.
Size: 68.5KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 566
Previews: 490
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ahhhh
Size: 125KB
Format: MP3
Downloads: 3227
Previews: 1544
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Harry - You just tell me where to sign. Lloyd - RIGHT ON MY ASS, AFTER YOU KISS IT!
Size: 59KB
Format: WAV
Downloads: 959
Previews: 1265
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Lloyd- Check please
Size: 8.92KB
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Downloads: 1266
Previews: 1463
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